Here now are my thoughts on the Chicago Blackhawks‘ historic streak ending last night against the Colorado Avalanche:
(dismissive wanking motion)
That’s about it, really.
The streak had to end sometime, right? I mean, I’m glad it was against the Avs and not, like, the Blues, Canucks, or Red Wings. That would’ve been unbearable.
But, eh. Avs. Whatever. It’s cool.
What isn’t cool is that Brandon Bollig gets called up after Patrick Sharp gets injured only to get stapled to the bench in the third with just about everyone else double-shifting. Really? Are you fucking kidding me? Can we just get him traded somewhere? Like, to Siberia?
Now, obviously, I’m not blaming Bollig for this piss-poor team effort. That would just be silly. It was really a team effort to be so terrible. Corey Crawford was just awful. Everyone got killed in faceoffs. They just got outworked by the Avs all around.
I’m just angry Bollig is still here, taking up a space that would be better filled by Ben Smith or Brandon Pirri or my grandma — anyone more talented than that bag of uselesness.
But, anyway, the streak was nice while it lasted, but I’m glad I don’t have to talk about it anymore. You know what would be nice to talk about? Winning another Stanley Cup. Let’s just focus on that, shall we?
If you’re already nostalgic for the points streak, check out the video below.